5 Key Strategies to Help Schools Better Support Bereaved Children

Childhood bereavement is a significant and often overlooked social and public health issue in Australia. Most children spend more awake hours at school than they do at home and for those who are grieving, the school environment can be particularly hard to navigate without the right help, support and understanding from educators, classmates or non-teaching staff.

According to the Australian Bureau of Statistics (2010), around 1 in 20 children will experience the death of a parent by the time they turn 18. This equates to an approximate 200,000 children aged 7–18 years old who are living with this type of loss in Australia right now and at least one child in every school classroom is grieving the loss of a parent.

Schools have a unique and essential role to play in supporting grieving students if only they had access to a rich set of resources that can be both practical and meaningful. The death of a parent can have far-reaching and long-standing impacts. Schools have the opportunity to monitor how children cope academically, socially and emotionally, as well as how they adjust over time.

But first, they need to understand how grief manifests in kids. For children, grief can have a profound effect on learning and school performance. Typically, they experience difficulty with concentration as distractions abound. Schoolwork may seem puzzling or pointless. Good students may see their grades slip, while students who were already struggling with school may see their learning problems worsen. Moreover, bereaved students also experience deep feelings of anxiety, sadness and loneliness.

There are a few ways in which a class teacher can play a crucial role in supporting a bereaved child within the school environment.

1 Acknowledge the Loss
Simply acknowledging to the child that they are aware of the death and letting the child know that they’re available to talk or listen at any time. Because many people feel awkward talking about death and are often unsure what the right thing to say is. However, saying nothing is the worst possible choice because silence may convey to children that:

• They don’t care
• This isn’t important
• Their teachers are not willing to give them support
• Their teachers are not able to give them support as it is too overwhelming to deal with.

2 Create an Inclusive Environment
Teachers are encouraged to be sensitive and create an inclusive environment throughout the school year, but particularly being mindful on days such as Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. They can involve the students in decision making, such as asking if they would like to participate in the craft activities and stalls related to these days, rather than assuming they would rather not attend. Teachers are also encouraged to use language that is sensitive and appropriate to all students, such as ‘a parent or caregiver’, rather than ‘mum’ or ‘dad’.

3 Offer Support and Resources to Children and Their Families
With some training, school staff will be able to identify the specific needs of grieving students at any specific point in time. By having access to training and resources, teachers will be better equipped to help students through their grief, how to talk with their friends or family about their feelings, what to expect from the process of grief, what death means (especially young children), how to navigate this process, and where to get resources.

4 Open up the Lines of Communication
Teachers can also make sure the grieving students know they are available to have open and judgement-free conversations. In most cases, teachers and other staff are not as close to the deceased as the student is. Therefore, children don’t feel the same obligation to protect their teachers that they might for their parents. They can ask questions and make comments that they often hold back from their families.

5 Make school a safe place
Creating a psychologically safe environment at school for grieving students cannot be undermined in supporting their mental health. Sticking to normal school routines and classroom structures, provide consistency in the child’s environment is crucial to maintaining their sense of psychological safety at school.

The school can work with grieving students to adapt their course demands – be more flexible with homework and tests, providing alternative activities that better match the student’s current state of mind.

Education about death and grief to all students in the school is also another important factor. It can help them better understand how to support their classmates coping with loss.